“Forgiveness is not optional”, the white-haired, wisdom-filled missions director said as he went on teaching the Perseverance course in our missionary training center. 

I sat there with my notebook open and a perfectly solemn facial expression. But in reality I was praying that the other students around me wouldn’t hear the battle raging in my mind. I’d just gone through an extremely difficult period that called for me as a believer to forgive from the heart. I knew much about forgiveness and read tons of verses in Scripture; but; not optional? How? How can I forgive someone who’s caused so much pain and heartache?

It just didn’t seem right… 

The wisdom continued. “It takes ability to first receive God’s forgiveness, a tender heart, and a good memory of what He has forgiven”, he went on. “To persevere in ministry, we must recognize the spiritual battle and keep the discipline of not assigning names or faces to our enemies, because our adversaries are the rulers and authorities of the world of darkness (Eph. 6:12) and not the people around us.” 

And Jonah came to mind. Jonah, who tried everything to escape seeing God’s goodness and forgiveness extended to his enemies. Jonah, who was angry with God’s gracious character and would have chosen rather to die than see compassion come upon those who didn’t deserve it. Jonah, who just couldn’t accept God for who He was and His will for what it was… 

Jonah would have totally understood me. But what God was teaching him then, He was telling me now. He would continue saving lives and extending grace and forgiveness, no matter what I thought about it, because He. Is. God. 

And I would persevere in ministry, stepping back and seeing His grace work wonders, when I would win the battle inside myself and accept His way. 

(Thank God for faithful wisdom-speakers, because learning about forgiveness inside a classroom sure beats learning about it from inside a large fish!)