“We’re sorry but our Benevolence Committee decided to shift their focus from international missions to local missions by supporting local church planting. You know how much I’ve been a great advocate of your work these past 9 years, but I’m very sorry—this is their decision.” As she finished explaining why my support had to decrease by 33%, she apologized again and offered to pray before ending our phone call. I accepted her apology, told her I understood their decision and “enthusiastically accepted” her praying although I was very disappointed (and honestly did not want to pray). She was praying but I couldn’t hear anything. My heavy heart was miles away, as I was trying to figure out which new church I should invite to become a new financial partner.

For 9 years, I had sent a financial report in each monthly newsletter. I had been the envy of many of colleagues who always wondered how I was able to raise so much support. I always had 35-50% more than I needed and it made me feel secure I would never lack, however now the circumstance had changed. I had recently returned from an exhausting 4 months home service trip that had required a lot of funding to travel to 11 different cities, subsequently, my account was lower than it had ever been. While on furlough, presentations about the work on the field had been done, invitations to join my prayer and financial team had been done as well. Now, what else could I do? 

When I hung up the phone, I paused and for the first time in 9 years, I wondered if funds in my account would be enough to help me end the year. Then, suddenly, I realized that my confidence had been wrapped up in how much money I had had in my account rather than on God—the One who always faithfully provides. Right there and then, in desperation I cried out: “God, what am I gonna do?” I didn’t hear an audible voice, but deep within my spirit I heard the Holy Spirit respond: “Nothing. There is nothing you can do”. In that moment, all I sensed was that I had to have faith, remain still, trust Him and wait on Him.

A week later, to my great surprise, as I received my weekly donors’ update report, I noticed some new financial partners. The following week, the same thing happened. Every week, there were new financial partners who were committing to support me financially. These new financial partners were filling up the gap. It was unbelievable!

The great lesson I learned was that God is faithful in supplying for all our needs. Where we are limited, He abounds in showing us how limitless He is, especially when we step aside and let Him do His part. Worrying didn’t change my circumstance, trying to sort things out in the flesh didn’t change my circumstance, but having faith, remaining still, trusting Him and waiting on Him made all the difference—God’s plan all along had been to provide for my all my needs.