The knowledge that we were following God’s plan did not produce automatic peace and contentment in my heart during our first weeks on the field. It was late July when we arrived, and the neighborhood outside the borrowed apartment where we first stayed was crowded, hot, and noisy. The sound of voices outside continued long past our jetlagged bedtimes while we also adjusted to not having air conditioning for the first time in many years. While my husband seemed to love our new overseas ministry immediately, I struggled with contentment.  

Tears that began at our commissioning service on Sunday evening continued the following day at the airport as we said goodbye to one college-aged daughter and one married daughter, our first grandson in her arms. While we were overjoyed that our youngest daughter was moving with us, I grieved the separation our leaving meant to her and her sisters, our parents, other family members, and friends. In the weeks ahead, the tears would continue until I also cried about my fear that tears somehow revealed a spiritual weakness on my part.

Several years later, as we returned for a few months of home assignment, I struggled with the reverse culture shock of seeing North Americans living in what seemed like mansions surrounded by large yards and having no shared walls with their neighbors, a stark contrast to city life in Europe.  

Women ministering overseas are not immune to feeling discontent. Philippians 4:11-13 speaks to Paul’s remedy. “Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content … In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.” For years I had taken Philippians 4:13 out of context, forgetting that this promise immediately follows his admonition about living contentedly with whatever circumstances God chooses to allow. In the heat. In a late, crowded, noisy culture. In a place where I spoke like a toddler and understood almost nothing, God could give me the strength to walk in contentment and joy.