My grandma and mom died about six months apart, and I spiraled into a pit of grief. 

I started having double vision, struggled to make simple decisions and spent sleepless nights wondering, If God loved me, why didn’t he heal my mom? 

I felt stuck, embarrassed that I doubted God and unsure how to step forward. 

When we are shaken by grief, how do we step forward?

1. Give thanks - We can join a support group, or find a trusted friend or counselor. 

I found a counselor who encouraged me to daily journal my thoughts and thanksgivings. She reminded me that nothing I wrote down would surprise God and that every day was filled with something to be thankful for. This was the last thing I wanted to do, but this helped me take a step out of the pit. 

2. Extend grace - Everyone handles grief at different times and ways. It catches us off guard and reveals our lack of control. Simple tasks can be overwhelming and leave us exhausted.  

We need to give ourselves grace to breathe and rest. We should complete the necessary things and let the other things go. We can remember this season is temporary and someday our eternal home will have no tears.

3. Cling to God’s love - Grief doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love us, but rather He is refining us to be more like Him. He promises to walk with us through the suffering and even holds our tears in a bottle (Psalm 56:8).  

I struggled with this because I wondered why the outcome couldn’t be different. But in His goodness, He knew the grief would pull me even closer to Him. I finally rested in Him after I pored over the Psalms and mediated on His promises. 

Walking through grief requires one step at a time. May we give thanks, extend grace, and cling to God’s love. 

“In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith - more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire - may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.” 1 Peter 1:6-7