I am not the woman I was when I left for the field twenty-five years ago. Some of that change is due to time and experience. A lot is due to practice.

Several years ago, I had an elderly friend. Beatrice had served as a medical worker in West Africa for twenty-four years, seeing and experiencing more tragedies than I could count, and yet she was an absolute delight. What made Beatrice such a wonder was not sparkling wit or razor-sharp intelligence. People flocked to her because of her heart. She had a joyful spirit and genuinely cared for others.

I decided that when I grew old, I wanted to be like Beatrice—the kind of senior people liked to be around. And I recognized that the only way that could happen was for me to start being that woman before I grew old.

Obviously, I could not alter my personality and become an extrovert like Beatrice. But I could change my focus. Instead of nurturing my inner curmudgeon, I could nurture my inner caregiver. Instead of looking for problems, I could look for possibilities. That was step one.

Step two was a change of heart. Romans 12:2 doesn’t say to transform yourself. It says, “be transformed.” I cannot change myself, but I can turn to spiritual disciplines, practices that make space in my heart for God to meet with and work in me.

They say practice doesn’t make perfect, but it does make permanent. I have to practice having a peaceful heart by taking time every day to sit in peace with the Lord so that when life gets hectic, His peace is already inside me. I have to practice seeing people and circumstances through the lens of God so that when slights and betrayals happen, I already see the offender as made in God’s image; when tragedy strikes, I already have a God’s-eye view.

Transformation is a process. Day by day, decision by decision, practice by practice. Have I become like Beatrice? Not yet, not entirely, but I’m getting there, molded by practice and the gracious work of God.