“I knew you were going to say that,” my coworker said with a delighted laugh. I smiled. In a land where even my skin tone shouted foreign, it felt good to be partially known. 

Completely known is another thing, though. There are things in my heart it wouldn’t be wise to let my coworker know, at least not yet. Deeper than that, however, are the things that God understands about me that never cross my mind.  

David, that man after God’s own heart, understood this. “Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts,” (Psalm 139:23) he sang. I wonder what brought David to this point of actually asking God to reveal his heart? Did he understand that his anxiety was an indicator that something more was going on within him? Whatever the cause, David knew only God could reveal that area where fear shattered the quiet inner peace of God.  

This sweet but hard spot is one I’ve often faced. I don’t always catch on quickly, but I’ve started to see the clues; I reach for another snack, or I’m not refreshed after a night in bed, or the words out of my mouth are riddled with complaints. These are all warning signs for me that it’s time to run to God. I’m so thankful to our God who truly knows me and can search my heart to gently heal it even while He continues to “lead me in the way everlasting.” (Psalm 139:24b)