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When each of us is born, we enter into cold, bright vulnerability.
As Dr. Curt Thompson puts it, we’re born “looking for someone who is looking for us.”
All the high-functioning adults around you? They came into this world naked, hungry, unable to take care of their own toileting needs, and unable to walk—unlike most of the animal kingdom. As baby humans, we can’t even escape predators.
But in that vulnerability, there’s an opportunity—for connection. When we can give little, others reach toward us.
(There’s a little packet of the Gospel in there, no?)
Psychologist Erik Erikson calls this development stage trust vs. mistrust. He considers it the most important stage of human existence, and fundamental to personality development.
Can I trust you?
Think of your favorite heroes of the faith. Like Abraham—who eventually followed God into nearly sacrificing Abraham’s own son. Through baby steps (Follow Me to a land I’ll show you), then adolescent, then adult steps of faith, God built trust with Abraham in Abraham’s vulnerability.
I think about this when I think about my family’s path overseas. I think of God beckoning us to Africa: Follow Me to a land I’ll show you. He built my trust through everything from the garage sale of all our stuff to the provision of resources for my son’s medical issues.
Once we arrived, like any good parent, He didn’t whisk us out of every risky situation. He was present within them. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, You are…with me.
He’s made me into a different person now. Love-filled trust changes everything about me. What rattled me before doesn’t make me blink an eye. I’m willing to walk with Him more and more into darkness. At the very least, He’s earned that.
I flip through our photo albums now and watch my kids growing up in trust, in presence. And I watch myself growing into trust of God, into presence, through my own mental photo album of God showing up again and again.
Has God earned your trust? And if it’s been broken—what do the two of you need to do to rebuild?
How do you go about rebuilding trust with God when it’s been broken?
Telling a Christ-following friend the story of how my trust has been broken helps me move back toward connection and feeling received. Sometimes they help me straighten out a narrative gone wrong, or help me envision God’s empathy toward me. And sometimes, I’ve needed a therapist.